You’ve got mail, and it’s a toddler!

Today, June 13th, marks a very important, if not slightly concerning, anniversary. It was on this day, 105 years ago in 1920, that the U.S. Postmaster General finally had to put his foot down and officially ban the practice of mailing human children via Parcel Post.
Yes, you read that correctly. There was a time in this great nation when parents, faced with the high cost of train tickets, looked at their kid, looked at the mailman, and said, “Yeah, that seems legit.”

Uniformed Letter Carrier with Child in Mailbag - Smithsonian Museum
Can you even imagine? Forget tracking numbers; you’re just hoping your kid doesn’t get lost in a sorting facility. You’re not worried about porch pirates; you’re worried about your toddler being left on the wrong porch. It’s a level of trust in the federal government that I, for one, simply do not possess. It was a bizarre, short-lived chapter in American history where “special delivery” took on a whole new, slightly terrifying meaning.

Article about a baby delivered via Postal Service - Smithsonian Museum
So today, let’s raise a glass to bureaucracy and common sense. Let’s celebrate the 105th anniversary of the day our government officially decided that children, unlike fruitcakes and catalogs, should probably not be sent through the mail. It’s a low bar for societal progress, but hey, we cleared it.